Age has a strange and beautiful way of catching up with you when you least expect it to. Just when you think you have reached your pinnacle of achievements and succcesses it nips at you in the hindparts. For example my travels have managed to take me over most landmarks. I absolutely enjoy my time away as I am a professional escape artist. When the environment around me gets too heavy on my shoulders I flee passport within my clutches. I travel to lands far away with the hopes of seeing those rarely whom can reinvigorate my mundane existince. I enjoy the heartbeat of every city I encounter; but the crux of my issue lies within my own heart. Its not fair to estimate that the reason I am here is due to a broken heart because after some mediatation on the subject I do not feel that I really had the opportunity to love at its core. Rather I was in surface love with an idea that did not suit me or really apply itself to my joy. I am not left alone with the wretches and ravages of a termination of love. While it seems like I have endured a significant amount of pain an embarassment I have survived it all still standing straight up on my pillar and continue to stride forward in life as I have yet to find its pause.
My own issues derive from an innate fantasy to actually live a life of normalcy. House, husband and children and undeniable love. These are things that I have only partially experienced and the love part was completely one-sided and entirely out of the question. So as I sit here and muse over the soothing sounds of German traffic and view the pastels of history in front of me is it to wonder what I am doing here? Is there a grander mission than this I should be exposed to. Is that which I so desire right within reasonable distance and I struggle to achieve its grasp? These are things that I don't understand. So I continue to be lead by heart and hand through my time here; girl bonded in friendship to navigate the sea of uncertainty once again however together as the sea is unprecdictable; it does. As it will.
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